A Low Evening

Today, the roomie, K, made a comment about our skinny friend, W. She was telling me about this girl one of her friends back home knows, and how this girl is a vegan, and is skinny as W, and looks really sickly. So K says, "I think W looks a little sickly, but not too much. I have gotten used to it."

First of all, I do not think W looks sickly. She is just very thin, perhaps one of the thinnest people I have met in person. But I always think people look way better skinny, so maybe I am not the best judge. However, K is just one of those girls who doesn't like the skinny look, i.e. is really jealous because she will never be that skinny. She was just talking earlier about how she needs to start running again because she is stress eating, gaining weight, and developing a "bigger" roll. How about eat less?? Anyway.

And second of all, this comment just really depressed me for some reason. I don't know if it was because I think W looks good, or I used to look like W and am slowly making it back there, so K would have thought/will think I look sickly too? Or I wished someone would say that about me? I love/hate getting the skinny comments. And lately I haven't been on the receiving end for any, and I want them back. When I get them, it is vindication to me that I am doing something right, because people are noticing my slim figure. So all night, I have been in a rather low mood.

And then I went to J.Crew and put a bunch of things in my shopping cart and am trying to resist pushing the "Buy" button. I guess it's better that when I am depressed, I shop instead of eat, but it's not so good for the checkbook. So we'll see. But all the things in my shopping cart are so cute....

Tomorrow is the other roomie, T's, birthday. Me, K, and our friend J are taking her out to dinner, but the restaurant is vegetarian, so I am already up one point there. I just need to make sure to read the menu carefully before I choose what to get, because they like to sneak in calories in some of their dishes. Like sour cream, or cheeses, or brown rice, etc. I need something with lots of veggies, and little else. Their dinner menu changes each night, so I will have to wait until tomorrow afternoon to look up the evening's choices on the website, otherwise I would have asked all of your opinions. And I made pumpkin cupcakes for her "cake", so I will take a cue from W, who never eats a whole cupcake, only the top with the frosting, leaving two-thirds of the cake to throw away.

Also, the Yankees are currently losing. They could have won the World Series if they had won this game, but no. Now things go back to New York for Game 6 on Wednesday. They better win that game, or I am going to be a wreck.

That's all I guess. Still trying to avoid that "Buy" button...

Love you, Skinnies!

~Sottile