It's Almost Perfect Here

I read the most uplifting, day-brightening post today! It was from Rain at dancing through raindrops and it was so sweet! Such great motivation for me to keep doing well :) My eyes literally began to tear up a little when I read it. You girls are such great friends! Thanks so much for all the congratulatory comments on my post this morning! I love having people to celebrate this with!

Well, on to my day. As the post of this morning, I was 120.5lbs. this morning! Yayy! I had an English muffin with some Nutella on it for breakfast. This is my new favorite breakfast on weekends when I'm not required to be in class at 8am, so I can eat at home. That was it. For the day :) I had about a 1/4 of a bottle of Vitamin Water because I was hungry and shaky around 3pm, and at 6pm I had four mini pretzels. I think my stomach has shrunk, because those pretzels filled me up! It was pretty cool to know that I only needed that small amount for the tummy rumbles to dissipate. It has been surprisingly easy to just totally ignore eating this weekend, and I am LOVING it. I definitely feel a change in my thinking about food; no longer is it something I even want when I am hungry. It feels like too much of a chore to make anything for myself, and I would rather just be hungry. Being full is the last thing I want right now. I told myself this morning that when it was after 5pm, I could have scrambled eggs made with my 30cal per serving Egg Beaters, or one of the three Rice Krispie things I made the other day, as long as I hadn't eaten anything else since breakfast. 5pm rolled around, and I was pretty hungry, but I just didn't want to eat. Too much trouble to put anything in my mouth, there was just no point to it. Why eat if I don't want to?

I hope this mind-set is here to stay!

I just weighed myself before bed, and I am 121lbs. :) Hungry too, so hopefully 120lbs. tomorrow at least? I can't wait until I am under 120; I am promising myself that once I am in the teens, I will never creep into the twenties again.

I watched a bunch of True Life episodes today. I love True Life. MTV is doing a new season starting tomorrow night, and the first one is True Life: I Need a Transplant. That one might be filled with crying. They were showing commercials on MTV all day for the new episodes, and one is going to be True Life: I Have Body Dysmorphic Disorder. I got excited, thinking it was going to be all about people who have unidentified ED's, but the only girl they showed just hates her face and thinks she looks like a monster, even though she is a pretty girl. I was disappointed, but maybe the other people on that episode will have some issues with their bodies. I love watching shows about eating disorders, because they are weirdly thinspirational for me, and sometimes I get tips from watching them as well.

I forgot to tell you all about my hair! I kept my haircut the same way - why mess with success? The girl I go to has been dying to put some subtle red highlights in, though, and has tried to convince me to do it, so this time, I said "What the heck!" and let her do it. And I love the way it turned out! I need to bring a mirror outside with me on a sunny day like a goon and see my hair in all its glory, because even in the paltry bathroom mirror light, I think the color looks awesome. Every so often, you catch this glimpse of red, but it looks so natural because the red is a deep auburn shade that blends perfectly with my dark brown natural color and the golden brown highlights she also puts in normally. I will try to get a good hair shot while in London so you all can see :)

Well, I am going to sleep and dream myself thin!

Love you, Skinnies!

~Sottile