Battle Ahead

On the advice of all you wonderful lovelies out there, I am going to buy the boots! Like embre said, you only live once. And you all are right about how they will never go out of style. So excited for them to get here :) I might make them a goal, like I can't wear them until I get to 120lbs., but it might be too hard to do that. We'll see when they get here!

I was doing wonderfully today! Up until 9pm this evening, I had eaten exactly 490 cals. I felt so good, a little hungry, but not too bad. However, K made brownies earlier in the evening, and when we were watching Grey's Anatomy along with our other roomie T, and our friend J, K just brings us each a brownie without asking if anyone even wanted one. So I ended up eating it; so angry. I didn't even ask for one, for goodness sake! Don't bring me something unless I specify that I want it! So I am putting myself at 700 cals for the day. Not horrible, but not as good as 490 cals would have been. Luckily, I just weighed myself, and I am still the same weight I was this morning, so I should see something lower tomorrow morning if my body does its usual lose 1/2lb. - 1lb. overnight deal. Still, that brownie is sitting in my stomach right now, being gross. Ugh.

Tomorrow night and Saturday night are going to be testing for me. Tomorrow night, one of my friends is having people over to her apartment for game night and some drinking. This is my plan: I will not eat dinner, and we are going over to her house at 7. I am going to make these Pillsbury Valentine's Day sugar cookie things, you know, the ones that are already pre-cut, and you just plop on the cookie sheet and bake them off? Yeah, those. They are only 60 cals per cookie, so I will have something safe to eat there. So I will have one or two of those, and perhaps a glass of wine. Around 300 cals, I think. Safe.

Then Saturday night, another of my friends is having people over to meet her mother and then go out to the movie Valentine's Day. She is having people over at 5, and her email said "There will be cake, ice cream, and perhaps fruit to dip in chocolate". It mentioned nothing about dinner, even though I know my friend, and I know she is going to cook dinner. So I will not eat before I go over, and when I get there, act all surprised and say "Oh, your email said nothing about dinner, so I ate an early dinner before I came!" Then, I will not have cake, which is fine because my friends know I don't particularly care for cake. I will not have ice cream either, because most likely it will be vanilla to go with the cake, and if you're going to have ice cream, it shouldn't be vanilla. Come on, boring. I will have some fruit, and maybe a few pieces in chocolate. But only two pieces in chocolate, and the rest plain. W, my skinny friend, will be there, so I will follow her lead on what to eat and not eat. And then the movie is at 6:50, so I will only have to not eat for two hours, and then I can enjoy the movie. I am really looking forward to it! I love Julia Roberts, and I will see anything with her in it.

I think that's it for now. I have to eat lunch tomorrow. I am at school straight through lunchtime. Ick. I packed a half cup of non-fat cottage cheese, 80 cals, and some mini caramel rice cakes, 70 cals. And water, of course. I just wish I didn't have to eat it, but if someone doesn't eat their lunch when everyone else is, people immediately start jumping all over them, asking them why they aren't eating. It's like a student lounge full of concerned mothers. My worse nightmare. I would rather avoid that, so I must eat.

Love you, Skinnies!

~Sottile